Creativity With Spam


If you’re looking for recipes for that gross canned meat, you’ve come to the wrong place…  This post is about the internet spam variety since  the blogs here have been getting a ton of spam comments recently.  I just mark them as spam and delete them, but some are so amusing that they deserve recognition.

Come on people.  Some of these are so obviously written by someone who doesn’t even speak English – am I really supposed to believe that they read my English blog and understood enough to appreciate it?   Some are just general comments, and I’m not (that) stupid, so they’re obviously such generic comments that they barely apply to the blog post for which they are written.  Some just don’t make sense at all as you’ll see below; I’ve dug up the best 5…  and I wonder how much spam I will get on this spam post?

– The following is a response I got to a post I wrote about local murders:
Me and my brother eat with a fork too, but that doesnt’ change or mean anything, does it?


–  I received the following comment on a blog post I wrote about a man and his eagle:
Definitely trust that which you stated. Your explanation was certainly the easiest to recognise. I tell you, I usually get irked when folks discuss problems that they plainly have no idea about. You managed to hit the nail at the head and explained out everything without complication. Maybe, people usually takes a signal. Will likely return to obtain more. Thanks.

– Here is a comment on a blog I wrote about everyday life:
Martin you beed to sort out the awful display after this weekend. Too many tired wasters.
Makes no sense whatsoever.

– Another one from the same everyday life post:
Intimately, the post is really the best on this precious topic. I concur with your conclusions and will eagerly look forward to your coming updates. Just saying thanks will not just be sufficient, for the exceptional lucidity in your writing. I will instantly grab your rss feed to stay abreast of any updates. Gratifying work and much success in your business endeavors!
Wonderful use of the English language there.  Get a thesaurus for your birthday, didja?

– And finally, this one had Europe (or Australia as it turned out to be) written all over it – my first clue was the use of the word ‘keen’.  One thing I’d like to know is, why are these spambots so enthusiastic about telling their brother?
Yes, I was very keen on that. So was my brother. He said he will check it out tomorrow. We will be back before you know it.
Great.  Is that a threat or a promise?

5 thoughts on “Creativity With Spam”

  1. My spam hasn’t been quite so creative for some reason, or in engrish. Most have sounded legitimate, but then their names or websites give them away. Generally I have deleted the more obvious, but left alone some of the more normal-sounding ones choosing instead to just remove their website links 👿

  2. You have better spam than I do. I usually get criticized for something, usually my graphic selection. Or the “I enjoyed your post, keep writing” from the tattoo parlor, dating site or something other ‘business’ site.

  3. Yeah, I’m ALMOST jealous. I keep getting the tattoo parlor guy, too. The same canned spam in most cases;. YUM! Canned spam.

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