Under the weather


Not too hard to do on a day like today. It seems to be just wonderful out. I only know this by looking out the window, and seeing the sky for most of the day. The frogs are still in chorus so it can’t be that cold. Me, I’m laid up with a headache, sore throat and slight fever. Mostly lost my voice this morning, but since I’ve had nobody to talk to today, I really don’t know if it is back. I don’t feel tempted to try it either. Since I was feeling OK yesterday, I am wondering how soon this stuff can pop up.

I’ve been feeling a bit sorry for myself today, because I have to take care of myself during illnesses. It has been that way for many a year now, but I miss the attention I used to get. Even when S. had a job, if I was sick she would always leave me a thermos of hot tea by the bed. I used to do little things like that for her when she let me know she wasn’t feeling well (she hid it better than I did, I admit I’m a bit of a whiner when it comes to being sick) The children are good at leaving me alone when I don’t feel up to my regular self. Not to say they won’t get me things if I ask, but this is all about not having to ask.

I wonder how many married or coupled people see the little things that are part of their lives together. I will be the first to admit that I didn’t see all of them when my wife was alive. I only started seeing them in the things that were missing after she was gone. Four years later, I still see the missing little things. Things that she did for me, and things I did for her. Things done just because of who we were alone and together. Making a cup of tea when sleep was hard to come by. Picking up a single rose for no reason. Letting her sleep in while I took care of the girls, or the other way around. That thermos of tea when I wasn’t feeling well. That little hug (or big one) when I came home from work. The hand on my shoulder when I was making dinner. Little things in life that can be very important to our lives.

In the future, and in the recent past, I’ve been noticing the little things in all my dealings with other people. Those little things put together make the big things in life happen.

Have a good day looking and giving the little things.

4 thoughts on “Under the weather”

  1. This is a topic that must have never come up during those times I visited. I knew it was just you and your girls, but I never knew why. A little (lot?) late I know, but my condolences. My mother lost my father just over ten years ago to cancer (remember my answer of oncologist during game night?).

    Anyway, being a whiner for illness is just a part of being a guy! We expect that hand-and-foot service for the smallest cold. 😛

  2. derek

    I guess it didn’t come up during any conversations we had. It is a fact of life for me. Not much I can do to change any of it. Being a widower just makes me who I am, just like being married for 20 years makes me who I am. We are reflections of how we handle this journey called life.

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