We had a great weekend, even though the weather on Sunday was horrid – so cold my Christmas teddy bear got frozen to the window!  Friday night was an all-night work session to finish up the planning and organization of our community theater’s awards show, which is where we went Saturday night.  But first on Saturday afternoon, it was a birthday celebration for our oldest who turned 9 on Sunday with a MUCH anticipated visit from family who live out of state.  We had a great time catching up and watching the kids open their birthday and Christmas presents, and the kids got to have a sleepover in the hotel with Grandma, Papa, and Uncle Bud while we went to the awards show.  The awards show was lots of fun, as always, and I got to watch 2 very good friends win much-deserved achievment awards.  Congratulations, guys!

It was lots of fun putting the show together, even if we didn’t have much time to do so due to last minute notice from the theater.  It was fun and also rewarding to watch the individual skits, shorts, songs, and awards presentations start as ideas on paper and then watch when they came together as a whole.  It’s also a fun excuse to get everyone together, and it’s always nice to see long-lost busy friends who are unable to get together but for this one night.  It might be fun to produce the awards show again next year, but then again, I’d love to have my best friend sitting beside me to watch them because I missed him this year – even though he did make an excellent host.  If there are a few individuals in the theater community who have a hard time because they don’t win awards, then let them have their hard time.  There is talk of cancelling this awards show, and I would be very sad if that happened.  It’s definitely a whole ton of fun for most of us, and I really don’t think we should let a few individuals ruin it for everyone.  That’s all I’m going to say on the subject for now, but expect to hear more from me once this very topic is discussed at the next production board meeting.

Sunday we had major Grandma-let-down, and because we didn’t want our oldest daughter to be depressed on her actual birthday, we let her have a friend sleep over.  During football season, we usually set aside Sundays for low-key stuff, like watching football, reading newspapers, and blogging, but we always end up with crazy kids so it’s never exactly low-key.  But I don’t usually cook dinner on Sundays, and today we ordered pizza.  Five minutes after the pizza was delivered, we noticed the delivery guy was still parked out front and that he was standing outside of his car.  Turns out, he had locked himself out of the car, and so we offered him a warm place to wait for his ride.  Since the temperature outside has been hovering around 0° all day, with wind chills near -20°, he gratefully accepted.  And he stood in our front hall for almost 30 minutes!  If he were outside, he would have frozen to death.  But it did feel a little awkward eating the pizza he delivered while he stood there.  We offered him a seat in the living room, but he opted to stand in the entryway, and I’m kind of glad because at least we were then eating out of his view.  Our 2-year-old kept asking about “the pizza guy”, and then he became scary to her – “I scared pizza guy” – probably cuz he was just standing there, doing nothing, and she’s never seen anyone do that in our front hall before.  But finally his ride came, thank goodness, and he left.  I wonder if he gets paid for the time he was standing in our house?  I wonder who pays for the gas that was used in his running car while he was waiting for his ride?  Should we have offered him some pizza?  It was kind of a weird situation, but it does make for interesting blog fodder.  Of course it had to happen on the coldest day of the year – that guy has a new story to tell!

No one as far as I know asked the question posed in the title, but today I certainly felt that way, as the nerd that is, not the one asking the question. I suspect my brother felt the same way. You see, we went to the funeral of someone we have never met. As such, we never met her family either so I am certain more than one person was wondering, “Who are they?”

Let me start at the beginning.  About twenty years ago my uncle met a woman and her family.  Eleven years ago they started seeing each other.  They never did get married, so I can’t call her my aunt, but they were close just the same.  In all that time none of us were ever introduced to his girlfriend; I’m not sure why.  A couple of months ago she was diagnosed with brain cancer, apparently inoperable, and was given a prognosis of just several months.  Then, the cancer showed itelf to be extremely aggressive and about about a week ago I learned her prognosis was downgraded to just a couple of weeks.  Less than a week later she was gone.

I suppose the wake yesterday would have been a more appropriate time for near strangers like us, but we didn’t make it so we went to the funeral today instead.  I pretty much went just to support my uncle and my mother as again I never met his girlfriend or her family.  She did leave behind several grievers though including children and grandchildren, so my uncle wouldn’t have been her first husband had they gotten married.  I must have looked like robotman at this funeral.  How can one be sad and grieved when he doesn’t even know the subject of the funeral?  Truthfully, as far as sadness goes I do tend to be kind of a robot at times.  Even at my father’s funeral I never broke down, and you can’t get much closer to someone to be grieved over than a parent (or child to put the bond in the other perspective), with the exception of a spouse. Needless to say my uncle was very grieved and like my mother with her spouse, JustJ with his, and countless others who have lost the one closest to them, he will not soon get over this (nor should he, if anyone thinks I am suggesting this).

The funeral was a three part affair.  We met at the funeral home and any who wished to were able to make last respects at this time.  Though I had never met her and thus didn’t need to see her body I nonetheless joined the line as we processed past her and out the door to the vehicular procession, the part that drivers everywhere are always thrilled about 😉 .  We headed to part two- the church where the funeral would be held.  It was a Catholic service, so I found much of the ritual unfamiliar and I found I could not join in many of the prayers.  Those prayers were either to Mary, to the Saints, or just prayers for the deceased.  As a Protestant I do not believe in any of those.  I pray to God the Father directly with Jesus as my only intercessor, and I believe once dead a person is judged immediately and then goes on to one of two places so therefore prayers for them are useless.  Prayers for the family and others still living on the other hand are more than welcome and I either joined in at these points or prayed in this fashion during the other prayers.

Part three of the service was the long procession to the cemetery.  It was at this point we made our departure and headed home.  My other uncle was also there and chose to stay so at least there was someone still there for my one uncle from his own family.  I do hope everything went well with it.  I expect we will be seeing my uncle and my grandmother soon.  My mother is very close to them both even if I don’t get close to my extended family.  She tells me there is a lunch planned for the near future.  Perhaps I’ll pay for it if my uncle will let me.  He always covers these things and it would only be right if he didn’t have to this time.

One of my favorite quotes has always been one for which I have no idea for whom credit should go: “Heroes are ordinary people who make bad decisions at good moments.” Surely with my wide-ranging blog someone must have a good idea from what source this comes from. I have thought long and hard for several years and have come up with nada.

Today, I was fortunate to attend a memorial service for a man who could be seen as a hero in the eyes of many in the very small community I was raised in. I know of at least one individual who considered Mr. Peverly their personal hero, my Uncle Bob.

The memorial service was a bit unusual. The atmosphere was very light and dare I say, fun. The Elementary School gymnasium was adorned with pictures of high school sports teams, trophies, and a batting cage. Over the speakers, music from the 1950s played (“Yakety-Yak,” “Rock Around the Clock,” etc.) Far from the slow, sober music one might expect for a funeral.

Mr. Peverly taught high school math from 1956-1988. He was perhaps better known as the coach of baseball, basketball, and cross country. Unfortunately, he retired from teaching one year before I entered high school. I did however have him as a substitute for French class; which he told us he knew absolutely nothing about. A good thing for him it was mid-term exam day.

Mr. Peverly and my uncle have had a very long, interesting relationship. My Grandfather Swary passed away when Uncle Bob was 15 years old…. years before either of my older brothers were born and before my parents were married. Being the youngest of 3 (and the only boy), Bob needed the guidance of a male figure. Because he saw in Bob someone who was more inclined toward sports than classroom studies, Mr. Peverly took him under his wing and nurtured him into the man he is today.

As one of the three speakers at the service, Uncle Bob told one very interesting story from his youth (one my entire family knows by memory). It seems that during his senior year, the varsity baseball team lost the Regional finals game 2-1. That night, Uncle Bob and some teammates decided to go and “Break some training rules.” They went out and got drunk. The next day, Robert was called to Coach Peverly’s office where he was asked (with his mother beside him) if he indeed did “break training.” Since Coach was one of the few people he could not lie to, Bob confessed. Punishment included sitting out the rest of the season (there were still regular season games left to be played) and being ineligible for MVP honors (for which he was sure to win and was even scouted by the KC Royals ballteam). Years later, Coach Peverly went to Uncle Bob’s house with the MVP award.

Everyone has a hero who they either looked up to in their youth or someone they continue to look to for inspiration. It was very comforting to see someone I have grown to respect give tribute to one of his heroes.

And to prove I do have some prowess in math Mr. Peverly taught math for 32 years at one school. If only he had stayed another 4 years. He must have known there was another Shaffer boy coming and ran.