I think this real individual is NOW the king of the humbugs.  Last weekend, a rather disgruntled gentleman shoved a Salvation Army bell ringer to the ground and stole the kettle that held the money passersby had dropped in.  When he was apprehended, the person stated that he “hates Christmas and got tired of the ringing bell.”  So much for the mob of Black Friday last year who trampled a Wal-Mart employee to death.

MAUMEE, Ohio (AP) — A man who claimed to hate Christmas shoved a Salvation Army bell ringer to the ground and swiped one of the charity’s red kettles stuffed with hundreds of dollars, police said.

The bell ringer, an unemployed woman, tried to pull the kettle away from the man Saturday evening, but he pushed her down and said, “I can’t stand you and your bell-ringing. I hate Christmas,” police said. The bell ringer chased him into a store parking lot before he tossed the kettle into the back of a stolen pickup truck and sped away, police said.

An empty kettle was found a day later. Police arrested Shawn Krieger of Toledo on Monday morning and charged him with robbery.

The Salvation Army estimated that the kettle held $500 to $700.

The bell ringer, whose name hasn’t been released, had been collecting money outside a general store for most of the day when she was shoved from behind, said Capt. Steven Lopes, coordinator of the Salvation Army in northwest Ohio.

“She was so upset,” Lopes said. “She was concerned that she wouldn’t be allowed to bell-ring anymore. We want her to continue.”

Krieger, 44, walked by the bell ringer at least twice before he made a grab for the money, said police Sgt. Jeff Siebenaler.

No witnesses have come forward even though the store was crowded, he said. “These things happen so fast sometimes people don’t know what they saw was a crime occurring,” Siebenaler said.

One shopper wrote down the truck’s license plate number, and others consoled the bell ringer, who suffered a small cut when she tugged at the kettle, Lopes said.

Evidence inside the stolen truck, which was found in Toledo, led police to Krieger, Siebenaler said. Krieger could face more charges for the stolen vehicle, Siebenaler said.

Krieger was being held Monday on $25,000 bond. The judge will assign a public defender to his case.

Not everyone likes the holiday season but what a hideous way to display it.  Coal is too good to put in this man’s stocking.

There are several things one can do right from the convenience of their car.  Fast food can be ordered and picked up. Convenience stores and pharmacies typically have a pick up window. In Las Vegas, a marriage ceremony can be performed while the couple sits in their car.  On Monday, a bank robber was able to successfully obtain a large sum of money from a drive-thru bank teller.  The perpetrator drove up to the window of the Lone Star National Bank in Pharr, Texas.  He slipped a note into the box listing his demands.  The female teller filled the order and the crook drove away.

I was torn on my reaction to this story.  From what I understand, there was no apparent weapon involved and the teller was behind a bullet-proof window.  However, there was no information regarding bank policy when confronted with that situation.  Yet at the same time, I could not help thinking that this would make a phenomenal genius post, but decided to give the teller the benefit of the doubt.

PHARR, Texas — A bank robber in South Texas held up the place from the comfort of his car.

Police in Pharr say a man used the drive-thru lane Monday morning to rob Lone Star National Bank. Police say the driver slipped a note to a female teller, who provided an undetermined amount of cash, then he drove away. Lt. Guadalupe Salinas says the man was alone in the car and did not appear to display a weapon. Salinas told The Associated Press there’s no indication that the robbery was an inside job. Law officers declined to release the contents of the note. Police are reviewing bank surveillance video. The FBI declined comment.

Ok, all you Dark Knight fans, I want to know who would dress up as one of the Batman bad guys and then try to rob a movie theater of its Batman posters? Maybe he thought there would be many other dressed the same way, but this wasn’t the first weekend of the show. Most of the movie goers that dress in costume will go on the first day, or at the very latest the first weekend. Well, it happened in Detroit. What was he thinking?

Now most who know me, know that I love to talk about ways to commit crimes. Someday, when I grow up, I would like to write a decent mystery/murder story. I just have some problems with developing characters, that is a story for another day. I can come up with good plots, and even a way to write about the crime and throw out a few false clues. But never in my wildest dreams would I come up with this sort of crime. I mean at the very least this guy should have been robbing a bank, but no, he wants Batman stuff. And how does he try to get it? Dress up as the Joker, and steal it during the Sunday Morning show…. Hmm…. There are a lot less people at the movie theaters for those early Sunday shows, but guess what guy, you’re going to stand out like a sore thumb in that Joker getup. He would have had a much better chance putting on a pair of Dockers and a dark shirt. That would have given him a chance of looking like one of the theater workers.

Oh well, it takes all kinds. I think he could make it in a Dumb crooks list somewhere.

Perhaps in an attempt to cash in on the Indiana Jones craze sweeping the nation (not to mention this blog), a treasured crystal skull was stolen from a New Age store in Claremont, California.

Hunt for the Crystal Skull Begins Early

Let me just point out that I was nowhere near California on the date in question.

Perhaps authorities should begin by questioning the two three young men (?) responsible for grave robbing to retrieve a skull to use as a bong. I was surprised to learn of the laid-back nature of the store. Although they have never had any trouble with shoplifting in the past, it would seem that such a high profile item would draw considerable attention. As with the MacGuffins (the Ark of the Covenant, Sankara stones, and the Holy Grail) used in the previous 3 Indy adventures, the crystal skull does have its basis in reality perhaps just not as widely known as some of the others.

Skip the lines. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull tickets on sale now!

Also from Worthyboards comes this hilarious real-life humor- thanks, Glory2000!

TOP 7 MORONS OF 2007

1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, ‘Please come out and give yourself up.’

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn’t control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: ‘Give me all your money or I’ll shoot!’ The man shouted, ‘that’s not what I said!’.

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??? A man spoke frantically into the phone: ‘My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart’. ‘Is this her first child?’ the doctor asked. ‘No!’ the man shouted, ‘This is her husband!’

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellooooooo)!

Okay, not school- or church- related, but if you really want a connection this was done by two young adolescents. What is the number one way to get caught and arrested for attempted robbery? Just hold up a police station. Unarmed. Words cannot begin to describe the actions of these two, so just click the link and read on.

In any event, at least they were unarmed. If they actually had weapons it could have ended up far worse for them.