Before turning in for the night, I like to periodically check the guide to see who is going to be on the late night gab fests.  Sometimes, they pique my interest (Jack Hanna on Letterman in which case I have to pass the word to tangent’s own animal lover, taylhis).  Last night, Jay Leno had the curiosity named Lisa Lampanelli.  I was introduced to this overtly shocking comedienne while on our trek to NYC and all I can say is WOW!  She stepped out and fondled band leader, Kevin Eubanks and was quick to make a heated quip about first guest, Vin Diesel (“tall hairless man, don’t know whether to nurse you or spank you”).  However, she kept to her goal of making it through her set without being bleeped, but came awfully close.

Before the guest came out, Jay’s “Headline” segment always is worth a view on Monday night.  One of the pieces was a playbill from a high school production of Kiss Me Kate. One of the things I like about some playbills is the shoutout/pat on the back spaces friends and relatives buy to give encouragement to the performers on stage (something that has been mentioned in our community theatre but…).  In any case, the playbill presented last night included the rather encouraging line:

Don’t bother coming home because you suck.

Love, Mom and Dad

OUCH… even if it was meant as a joke what a message to send a young person.  No wonder the country’s youth has self-esteem issues.

Ok, I was scanning the news this evening and ran across this headline (on CNN if you must know) “Britney Reveals Hot New Body”. Now my first thoughts were “Who Cares?” Then I thought did she steal it? Then can I get a new body too, my knees aren’t what they used to be. And again with that thought, How did they attach it and why not a new brain? All that from one little headline.

Now over the years, I’ve noticed many headlines that can be read in more than one way. Most of this is due to the fact that headlines are rarely punctuated. Good punctuation can define what the sentence means, bad punctuation can give another meaning entirely. Words with multiple meanings can be used to misinterpret the meaning too.

This tendency in headlines has even given the late night talk show hosts something to ‘talk’ about. And they just keep showing up in the papers, and now on line. You would think that avoiding this would be taught in Journalism schools. Or not, maybe it sells more papers. So news day, add a heading that people will take different than intended, It should sell more papers…

I guess it wouldn’t be fair to just leave you with one headline would it?

So for your pleasure

The Funny Pages

Witty Quotes

And finally

Headline Humor

Enjoy…